Skip to product information
SALTLANTIC™ Surf Co. "Stellar Wave" Tee
$30.00
NASA Surf Report: Stellar Wave Edition
Location: Low Earth Coastline
Wave Height: Interstellar gnarly—classified as “cowabunga magnitude.”
Tide: Lunar‑powered, pulling harder than your ex’s gravity.
Rocket Status: Blasting off in the background, probably jealous of your drip.
Palm Tree Detail: Two witnesses on duty, swaying in approval.
Astronaut Condition: Helmet secure, vibes unsecured.
Mission Objective: Shred the cosmos, ignore the laws of physics, look cooler than the rocket.
Risk Assessment: 100% chance of wipeout, 0% chance of regret.
Vibe Forecast: Stellar. Sustained. Gnarly.
Basically, it’s proof that SALTLANTIC™ doesn’t just surf—it files cosmic surf reports, launches rockets as background noise, and lets palm trees handle mission control. 🌴🚀🌊